23 Weeks!

23 Weeks and 5 days actually!

Things are looking great!  2 very healthy baby boys!  The doctor said everything is looking symmetrical!  They are currently 1 lb 7 oz and 1 lbs 9 oz.  We want them to grow at the same rate and continue to be the same size!  They are currently 6 days ahead the average baby at this stage.   They are both very active and I can feel them fluttering around and kicking all the time!!  Baby A is exceptionally active!!

Both babies together are measuring like a 28 week Singlton.  My stomach is measuring 30 weeks! The fluid on both babies looks great too!

Thank you for continuing to pray for us!  God has answered prayers!!  I pray everyday for the babies that they are growing and developing in His image!  I am also praying that I will be able to exclusively breastfeed both babies!  If you remember with Austin we struggled in the beginning and I had to work really hard to build up supply.  This time I am praying specifically for my milk supply to be ready to feed 2 babies!    We are also praying specifically that both babies will get into position at the right time for a natural birth!  A C-Section is scheduled but I would love to be able to have the babies naturally!

Almost through the first trimester!

We are on the home stretch of the first trimester!  With Austin I was never nauseous or anything but with this pregnancy I have had quite the case of nausea... I have had a loss of appetite too.  I am so glad that I didn't have to go to work while feeling this way.  There were days when it knocked me out until 3:00pm!  I am starting to feel less nauseous and less tired which is a good thing!

We have already had 4 ultra sounds!  We can see their hands and feet and their nose!  Their heartbeats are great!  At this point they are both 2 inches long!  We want them to grow and develop at the same speed so that is great!  They each have their own placenta which means they have their own blood supply!  This is also good news because they won't be fighting over the nutrients and one won't be stealing from the other!

I have been trying to figure out what we will do for child care in the spring.  I have a few leads and messages out so hopefully something great will come along!  Although, I would love to figure out how I can stay home with my babies.  It breaks my heart that I didn't get to with Austin and I would do anything to get to stay at home with these babies!  I will be looking at the budget and am willing to make any cut needed!  We have refinanced our house so the payment is lower.  Our car will be paid off shortly after the twins are born.  We have gotten rid of our Dish Network.  As well as some other things here and there.  I need my Jamberry Business to go a little deeper to make that be my full time income!  Please pray that God will lead me in the direction HE wants me to go in and that He will open a door that leads to me to the place my heart longs for.... to stay home and raise my babies! As I type this my eyes are filled with tears because the thought of not getting to be the main caretaker and provider during the day and night breaks my heart.  My heart aches to be a stay at home mommy.  I need strength from God.  I trust God and His plan.  I pray that He will show me a way to make it work.

What a Mighty God we serve!

I am sure you have all heard our exciting news by now!  We are so excited to announce that Austin will be a Big Brother!!!  We are so blessed and thanking God continuously!

I had told everyone that the pregnancy test would be on Wednesday, 6/17 but it was really on Tuesday 6/16.  We decided to do it this way because wanted the 16th all to ourselves!  Austin and I got up Tuesday morning and went to the doctor.  He thought it was so weird that they were going to take my blood.  I cried almost the entire way to the doctor's office and just prayed to God and sang songs of praise!  I knew that no matter what I would still love God and praise his Name.  I know he loves us and I know that his plan is perfect and so is his timing.  

Before getting my labs done I snapped this picture in the waiting room and sent this message to Ryan: 

"No matter what, I get to be this little guy's mommy!"  

I got my labs drawn and then ran a few errands and went home.  Ryan took off work this afternoon and got home just in time for lunch!  As we were finishing up lunch the phone rang.  We really wanted this moment all to ourselves and just let it go to voicemail.  We cleaned up everything from lunch and got Austin settled in with playing bowling on the Wii.  About 30 min later we sat down to listen to the voicemail.

Our eyes filled with tears of joy as the nurse said, "Congratulations!  You are definitely pregnant!"  She went on to tell us more information about my lab numbers but Ryan and I just hugged and cried and thanked the Lord for this blessing!!!

Then we went to tell Austin.  We told him that we had something very exciting to tell him!  We told him that he was going to be a Big Brother and that we were going to have a baby!  He said, "and they are growing in Jinae's tummy!"  LOL!  I told him the baby was growing in my tummy and he smiled, gave me a hug, and wanted to get back to his game.  haha.  

We got our special shirts on and took some pictures!  I have had these shirts in our closet for over 2 years now!  I designed them and had them printed for what seems like ages ago! 

I am so excited that I am healthier now for this pregnancy!!  I am 9lbs lighter than what I was when I got pregnant with Austin!  This picture isn't as great as other ones but... I had just finished working out!  This was the morning of my transfer.  I had gotten up at 4:15am to go to the gym for a 5:00 class!  I had over 10K steps by 6:30am!  I did more running that morning that I had ever done!  It felt great!  

Sooooo  back to my labs....

I won't know if we are having 1 baby or  twins until a couple of months into the pregnancy.  My hCG number was great!  My progesterone number was a little low.  It needs to be a minimum of 10 and mine was an 8.  So my doctor prescribed some more medicine to help with that.  I am going to continue the 3 patches, changing them every other day, as well as the estrace and endometrine suppositories, and now I will be adding in a progesterone shot.  I have to do 1 shot every night.  We called the pharmacy to find out when it would be ready.  We had a little time so I quickly did my nails for the occasion!
I have also had these custom Jams for quite some time and it was the first time for me to try the white tips!  I LOVE how it turned out!  

We drove up to the pharmacy at Overland Park Regional Hospital to get the medicine.  The pharmacist had to counsel me with the injections.  My eyes about popped out when she showed me the needle.  This was not the same needle I used before.  Was she joking?  Did she grab the wrong ones???  I politely said, "do you have a smaller needle?"  She looked at me and said that this was what it was.  I told her I had used a smaller needle before.  She looked at me and I looked at her for a couple seconds... I told her that it was for a different medication and she then explained that this medicine had to use this needle.  This is a 22 gauge that is 1.5 inches long.  This is extremely bigger than my other needles I had used during IVF.  I think my IVF needles would fit inside of this one!  Ha!  The awesome thing about these were that insurance covered a portion of the cost and 1 month supply was only $45 plus the cost of the syringes/needles.  Compared to all of the other kind of medicine I have had to take this is a DEAL!    The shot has to go in the upper buttocks so I am a little worried about being able to do it myself.  Ryan doesn't think he can help me...   For the first one today, since it was a much bigger needle than what I am used to I didn't want to do it myself.  Jinae helped and administered the injection!  I first used ice for about 5 min to numb the area and then Jinae was able to do the injection and I barely felt anything.  They will be fine.... I will need to ice before each one and I may be able to do it myself.  I'm not sure - otherwise Ryan will have to figure out how to get over his fear!  

Thank you so much for praying for us!  We are so very excited and feeling very blessed!  We will continue to pray and we will also pray for other couples who are dealing with infertility.  It is a very emotional time and infertility is very personal and difficult to cope with.  I am so glad that God has carried us through this journey and that I didn't have to do it alone!  I have discovered that many couples go through this kind of thing and no one around them has any idea!  For us, it has been good to talk about it and find others who have experienced what we are going through.

  

Waiting

I realize I have been much quieter on here this go around. There isn't as much to update because I don't have to grow any extra eggs and therefore I only had 1 appointment to check the lining of my uterus. 

Ryan and I had the opportunity to talk to Ty, our pastor at church! He prayed for us and with us. We talked to him about how we have placed all our trust and all our struggles and everything we are going through with this in God's hands!! We talked about the first time and how it didn't work but that we did not fall in our faith.  Pastor Ty asked us if we still believed God loves us even if it didn't work and if this was not his plan... And our answer is YES absolutely! We know God loves us all no matter what. We feel his presence everyday and I know he is with us! I have also talked to one of the elders of the church and he has prayed for us with the rest of the elders!  

I had the FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer) on Thursday 6/4.  The thawing went great and there were no issues at all!! Everything went great!! 

Now we are playing the waiting game.  Austin got to go to Montezuma for a week to hang out with Nana and Papa! I was here at home laying down and doing absolutely nothing. It has been hard to just sit and do nothing. I miss going to the gym and I miss all my excercise classes and being active. If you are my friend on Fitbit you can see the decline in my steps. I am still wearing it so I can make sure I'm not doing too much.  Haha. So I went from getting an average of 18k steps to now getting 1 or 2k. But resting and staying off my feet is something I can do to help give these little guys their best chance! I have been on walks... Very slow and short walks... But that is ok!! 

I am so happy that Austin is back home!!! 

I have my pregnancy test on the 17th... Thank you for your comtinued prayers!!

Getting Ready!

Since May 15 I have been taking medicine to prepare my body for FET, Frozen Embryo Transfer!  I have been taking Estrace and also using patches to help thicken and prepare my uterine lining.  I wear 3 patches and change them every other day.  I had an appointment on the 28th and my lining is at a 6 which is where it needs to be right now.  They will want it to get thicker before Transfer day though.  My estrogen level is over 1000 and it needs to be at least 500!  Everything is on track!  I start the endometrin on Saturday.

Since starting this medicine I am no longer able to take the AdvoCare pills that I was taking before.  My doctor wasn't sure how it would react with the medicine so to be safe I am not taking them anymore.  These pills helped me feel full, control cravings, give me energy, and keep me full for longer!  Since I have not been taking them I feel hungry all of the time, have cravings, and not as much energy.  HOWEVER, I have taught myself some good and healthy habits that I am able to continue and maintain!  I am still working out and striving to be healthy!  I can still drink AdvoCare Spark (just 1 though) and use the Meal Replacement shakes, bars, and snacks!

I am now about 8 pounds lighter than I was when I got pregnant with Austin.  I have reached my first goal for what I wanted to lose before FET.  I have lost nearly 3 pant/dress sizes!  I am getting stronger and feeling great!  I can feel the muscles in my legs and even in my abs!

It is because of the Grace of God I have been able to set and achieve these goals!  Thank you to everyone who has continued to pray for me and my family!

My Transfer day will be Thursday 6/4.  My mom will be coming up to get Austin and will take him home with her for a few days.  This is so I can truly be on "bed rest" and "couch rest" for the days following the transfer.  This is a much more ideal situation since last time I went right back to work after 2 days and had a stressful month with conferences, evaluations, etc..  This time I will truly be doing nothing!  I will be laying down... and I'm sure after the first day I will be going crazy.  I have been planning my activities for that time though!  I have lots of Jamberry Sample sticks that need assembled as well as a 4 seasons of LOST to watch again!  LOL.  It will be hard for me to sit and do nothing since I have been so active and working out every day since I started my weight loss journey.  I will be ready to get back into a workout routine!  (dr approved of course!)

 

20 lbs GONE!

  Thank you Jesus for this amazing transformation!   So happy!!  (and not done yet!)

Get Healthy, Be Healthy!

Wow!  I have not updated my blog in a while!

My 24 day Advocare challenged ended at the end of March and from that challenge I lost 12 lbs and at least 5 inches!!!
I have continued to use many of the Advocare products and learning how to eat healthy and I am also still very active!  I have a fitbit and I love how it tracks my progress and my activity!  For me it really helps me do just a little bit more!  I set goals for myself throughout the day and I really strive to achieve those goals!  Giving myself small achievable goals gives me the satisfaction of feeling successful while I work towards my bigger goal!!  I need that motivation, feeling of success, and encouragement to help me!

My first goal each day is to reach 10,000 steps before I leave work!  When I walk in the mornings before work and also on my lunch I can get 10K steps before I even eat lunch!  Then I set goals for myself for when I get home too!  Setting small achievable goals makes you feel successful and gives more motivation to reach the next goal!  I am averaging 18K steps a day!  "No one owns a fitbit...  the Fitbit owns you!" This is so very true!  HAHA!  I just want to get my steps in and if I'm not wearing my fitbit (if it is charging) then I really don't have any motivation to do anything...  like if I am not wearing my fitbit those steps don't count.  LOL.  sad, I know!  But it has helped me keep track of my steps, calories burned, active minutes, and sleep.  Which, by the way, my fitbit has been telling me just how awful I have been sleeping....  going to need to get that figured out too!   If you don't have a fitbit, you should get one and then add me as friend!

I am also using the Free Coaching at the YMCA!  I get 30 minutes with a trainer each week!  The trainer has been teaching me how to do the weight machines and helping me figure out the settings and weight I need for each machine and telling me how many reps and whatnot I need to do!  After we finish going through all of that then I can start using those sessions for different kinds of workouts.  Since this service is free they aren't designing a workout or program for me but instead I can tell them what I want to do or what I want to work on and they will give me a workout.  So if I want to work on my core I can ask for a core workout and they'll tell me what to do.  Basically it is all lead by me and then they guide me.  I never thought I would say that I enjoy working out, but I really do!  I love getting on the elliptical and treadmill (with my fitbit on of course!  lol)  and also going to classes!  Everyone at the YMCA has been sooooo friendly and nice!  I have talked to several trainers and they have all invited me to their classes!!  It is nice to know I am welcome to try out any of the classes and that I can change it to be lower impact or however I need to without judgment!  There are so many different types of people in each class!  This helps me feel comfortable too!  AND if I do a class that my fitbit doesn't track...  for example a core/ab workout, I can go to my fitbit app and log that workout so I can see my active minutes!

Soooooooo my most exciting news right now is that I have lost 18 - yes that is EIGHTEEN- POUNDS!!!  I am soooo excited about that!  I am just 9 pounds away from my FIRST weightloss goal!  Well- second I guess since my first goal was to lose 10 pounds on the Advocare 24 day challenge which I DID achieve that goal!!!  I wanted to loose 27 lbs by June 1st and I think I am going to blow right past that goal EARLY!!!  I am wearing shirts and pants that I haven't worn in years....  It is pretty amazing at how much better I am feeling!!

I definitely lift it all up to God!  I know that I would not see this kind of success without him holding my hand and carrying me along!!!  There was a week in there somewhere after my Challenge was over that I wasn't as faithful in my daily prayer.  Not that I didn't pray but that I wasn't specifically praying for my weight loss.  I was stuck for several days....  I started praying again for my weight loss journey and almost immediately lost 3 more pounds!  I CANNOT do this journey alone!  The power of Prayer is amazing!

Thank you everyone for your continued support and prayers!

Change isn't always easy

I am officially on day 7 of my 24 day challenge with Advocare.  While I know this is a 24 day challenge I also know that this is a lifestyle change too.  I have already changed so much about my daily habits.  My meals are no longer based on carbs and cheese.  I have only had a very small portion of carbs in the last week.  This is a huge change for me!  One that is not easy but really has not been too bad.  I finally have the right motivation and determination to change my eating habits......  I am even eating things like asparagus.  I am also starting to move more!  I have been to the gym 3 days where there is an indoor pool and can swim laps!  I love swimming and I love doing laps!  Austin also loves it too because he gets to just play around and swim!  I have also been getting up early to walk before my day even starts.  I have been doing 2 miles each morning!  Harley is really loving this change as well!  She walks much better on a leash in the early morning hours too!  I have also started to walk during my lunch break at work.  It is a short 25 minute break and if I don't have recess duty I have an extra 15 minutes!  I just go up to the track behind the school to walk.  I am able to walk at least a mile during that time and on days when I don't have recess duty I am able to get 2.5 miles in!  I have also started to run a little during that time.  Walk 100 meters and run 100 meters.  My legs are sore but I am feeling pretty good about it!  So changing my diet and exercising combined with Advocare I am feeling pretty good about my progress!  

I want you to know I am not doing a "starvation" diet at all!  I often do not feel hungry and when I do get hungry I eat!  The Advocare products are packed full of protein which helps keep me full!  I have been using the Meal Replacement Shakes for breakfast and/or lunch.  I has only 220 calories but it has tons of protein and other nutritious things in it!  I also eat the Advo Snack bars and they are pretty good and again are packed full of protein.  I also eat lots of fresh fruits during the day!  I am not drinking Mountain Dew anymore.  Instead I am drinking Spark.  This still has caffeine in it but is a much healthier choice.  It is also an appetite suppressant.  So, no I am not starving myself!  I am eating healthier which keeps me fuller for longer!  In the last week I have been offered Cinnamon rolls, cookies, free pizza, cupcakes, chocolate covered cookies, pop, etc... and I am so proud of myself for not even giving it a second thought.  OH And I am drinking TONS of water!  I am drinking more water than I have ever drank before!  I am so thankful for my student teacher because it allows me to do drink water and take restroom breaks!  I don't know what I'd do if it was just me!  When I am teaching I am so busy that I don't have time to drink nor am I able to go to to the bathroom whenever I want.  I know that God puts people in our lives for a reason and He just so happen to give me a ROCK STAR student teacher and I am able to drink lots of water as well as take lots of restroom breaks and not have to worry at all about leaving the classroom frequently!

Thank you for all your continued prayers and support!  Ryan has been such a HUGE supporter during all of this!  He has also changed his diet for our meals we eat together which makes it a lot easier!  Kayla is doing the 24 day challenge with me as well so we have been communicating about our goals and achievements and cheering each other on!  I would love for you to join us on our challenge! Let me know if I can help you get started and we can do it together!

Next steps

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I had my follow up appointment today with Dr. Milroy.  She explained and went over my IVF cycle.  She went through all of the records and showed us how great everything was.  All of our numbers were perfect.  So why didn't it work?  She said that the uterus lining needed to be a 6 and mine was 6.3.  So that number was where it needed to be but she said that maybe that wasn't enough.  So for our next cycle I will take the same suppositories as well as wear a patch and work my way up to 3 patches.  She said they will monitor the lining closely through sonogram and if it is not thickening up the way she wants it to then she will give me even more medicine to make it happen.  She also explained that even if the embryo looks perfect on the outside that it may not be perfect on the inside.  She said that if it is not quite right on the inside that it won't implant.  She said there is no way to tell from the outside unless genetic testing on the embryo is done.

We have decided to do FET this summer when I am not working so that I don't have the stress of being a teacher and don't have to worry about going to work.  FET is Frozen Embryo Transfer.  We have 3 very good quality of embryos still.  Our little "Frosties!"

The doctor told me that I needed to use this 3 months to loose some weight.  This is something that I have known for a long time.  I know that I need to loose weight.  I know that I need to eat healthier and be more active.  I am now committed to doing that.  I have contacted my cousins, Britt and Betsey, about the Advocare products and I think I will give that a try along with being more physically active!!  I am excited to get healthier!  I will need lots of support and encouragement from all of my friends and family!  So don't be offering to make me pancakes for breakfast!  ;)  And I better not see any of you eating a cinnamon roll!!  LOL

Thanks again for all your prayers and support!!!

Moving Forward

It has been almost a week since we heard the devastating news that IVF did not work.  I am so happy that I have such an amazing God so that I don't have to travel this journey in darkness.  Because of Him I know that this is not the end.  Because of Him I am not living in darkness after learning the news.  Because of His love I am given strength, comfort, and clarity.  Though I do not have all the "why" answers I cannot imagine going through something like this without Him.  He knows the bigger picture.  His plan is bigger than mine will ever be!  I have always been praying that this IVF journey was His plan!  I prayed that I would be on His path he as for my family and I.  I know that God answers all prayers!  We felt His presence and saw his answered prayers through each step of the way!  The IVF expenses were much lower than we were originally quoted.  Each appointment I heard nothing but "everything is perfect."  At the egg retrieval we got 13 eggs.  From that point I prayed for the perfect amount!  I prayed that we would be given the perfect amount of embryos!  I didn't know what the perfect amount would be.  We prayed and prayed and prayed and God gave us 5 very good quality embryos.  The doctor said she has never seen this good of quality of embryos before...  let alone FIVE!  Was five really the perfect amount???  If 5 babies was what God intended and 5 was the perfect amount then that is what it would be!  We continued to pray as 2 embryos were transferred.  We prayed for God's plan that it would still be this path.  God DOES answer prayer!  His answer may not always align with what our plan is but he does answer prayer.  God has told us that 5 was not the perfect amount.  It is not time yet.  This week as I fell into darkness on Monday I felt his hand reach down and pull me out.  He has surrounded me with so many wonderful people who love and care for me and my family!  We have received countless messages of encouragement and Jinae and Beth provided a couple meals for us as we gathered our emotions.  Austin has been so awesome. He was so sweet and told me that I don't need to be sad but that it is ok to cry if I want to.  He would ask me if I am doing ok.  He would hold my hand and sit on my lap and give me hugs.  I have continued to pray and while I don't know what the bigger plan is, I have comfort in knowing that He does and whatever that will be I will follow!

We still have 3 very good quality embryos just waiting to get their chance!  Perhaps 3 was the perfect amount?  I don't know.  But I will pray about it and trust in God and His plan.

So moving forward:
Ryan and I have an appointment on March 3rd to talk to the doctor about our options as we move forward.  She will talk to us about FET, Frozen Embryo Transfer.  It is a procedure that costs much less.  ($2200) The medicine for FET is a lot less as well as I won't need to have nearly as much.  My body won't have to go through as much with FET since they don't need to retrieve any eggs.  I don't know when we will do FET but I know that God will lead us to His path for us!

Thank you for continuing to pray for us!    

Walk by Faith

It is with a heavy heart to inform you all that IVF was not successful. Heartbroken has been my word of the day but instead I will use FAITH. It is with faith that I will find peace and comfort. It is with faith that I can continue to smile.  I have faith in God's plan.  My faith has been tested but I have not fallen. I walk with the Lord in faith! 

Thank you for your support.

Lara, Ryan, and Austin

Sent from my iPad

We Believe

We Believe
(Click)

http://youtu.be/FtPmX7e_Rpw

2015 is shaping up to be twice as nice!

This is the story of how Ryan and I began our IVF journey!
As all blogs, the most recent post is first so of you want to read in order,  please scroll to the bottom.

We truly appreciate all your love, support,  and prayers!

Look for an update after the 16th for official confirmation I am pregnant!  Thank you for praying with us!

Transfer Day

Today Ryan and I went in for my 11 o'clock appointment!  The doctor came in and talked to us about our embryos!  She asked us how many we had thought we would want to be transferred. Ryan and I had been talking about it and we decided that we wanted two to be transferred if possible! She said that two had already been frozen and that she also was thinking two as well!

2 Embryos were transferred!  Here are our 2 babies!!

2 were transferred and my body has to accept both in order to have twins.  We won't know if I am having twins until several weeks into the pregnancy.

A fifth embryo was also pretty good quality they are just watching it this morning and will probably freeze it this afternoon!  This means we had 5 very good quality embryos!  She was so excited about that.  They are ranked in different categories and she told us she doesn't see very many embryos as good of quality in all areas, let alone 5 good ones!!  The other 2 embryos are being watched.  They have a little more work to do before they can be froze.

We have been praying for the embryos to grow and develop and our prayers have been answered!  What a mighty God we serve!

The procedure was pretty quick and easy.  Ryan got to come in with me!  They used sonogram and a catheter to guide and place the embryos in my uterus.  Now my body has to accept the pregnancy!  We are praying for a healthy pregnancy and that my body accepts it!  I pray that God wraps his arms around my body and guides the embryos to implant in the uterus!  Thank you for praying for us!  

Here is the first sonogram picture!!!  The little white dot is where both embryos are!  

I go in for a pregnancy test on the 16th.  I can't do a home test because I have been pumping my body full of the hormone that home pregnancy tests detect and I will get a positive regardless....  so I have to wait for the blood test.  This is going to be the longest 2 weeks ever!!!  

I lift it all up to God!  

Divide and grow

Today I was updated with how my embryos are doing. Out of the 8 that were fertilized, 7 are still dividing and growing! This is great news!!  They won't update me again until Monday morning.

During this time I am preparing my body for the transfer.  I am taking a progesterone and estrogen pill.  I take it 3 times a day.  These two hormones are essential for a pregnancy to happen. Without it, my body would reject the pregnancy.  They are strengthening the lining of my uterus.  I am also taking a steroid that will help prepare the lining as well and also fight off any infection or bacteria that might get in the way.   I am also taking an antibiotic to prevent infection from the egg retreival.  The last thing I am taking is baby aspirin. This seems so strange to me because I have always known not to take aspirin with pregancy but this low dose will help with blood flow to my uterus which is good because when your estrogen level gets so high the blood flow isn't as great.

The transfer is on Monday mid morning. I do not know how many they will transfer. All of that will be decided on Monday when we go in to talk to the doctor and look at the quality of each embryo.

Thank you for your continued prayers!!!!  God is Great!!!

Embryos are growing!

On Wednesday they were able to retrieve 13 eggs.  9 of the eggs were mature so all 9 of them were fertilized using ICSI.  This is a process where they take a single sperm and inject it into my egg.  They did this with all 9 of the mature eggs.  This morning when they went to check on the eggs they found 8 fertilized and continuing to grow!!

We are very happy with these numbers!!!  I don't know if all 8 will survive and continue to grow up to the transfer.  They will call me again on Saturday to update me with how they are doing.  It is a very delicate process.  No they will not transfer all 8 back to me!  They would either transfer 1 or 2 embryos.  If there are any other embryos that are still growing then we will freeze them.  We can use those in the future.

They will update me on Saturday with how they are doing!  We are praying for the perfect amount and healthy embryos!

The transfer is scheduled for Monday morning!

Eggs Harvested!

This morning I went in at 7:30.  They gave me an IV and went over all the paperwork and procedure.  Everything went great!  They retrieved 13 eggs!  That doesn't mean that ll 13 were mature though.  They will call me tomorrow to let me know how many were fertilized.  Then they will monitor them to see if they continue to grow.

My transfer day is Monday Morning.

Right now I am feeling tired and am a little sore  Which is expected.
Tonight I will start a new round of medicine.  I will be taking Endometrin which is a progesterone.  I will also take Estrace which I will have to update you later on what that is for...
I also take an antibiotic tonight to make sure I don't get an infection.
I'll also start Medrol and I'll have to update you later on what this for.  Right now I can take Tylenol 3 for the pain.

Last shot!

I took the trigger shot!  I had a little mini crisis.  I didn't have one of those plastic connector pieces for it to get the medicine out of the vial.  For the Menopur shots that I mixed each time I had a plastic piece which made it very easy to get the medicine out.  For the HCG (trigger shot) Ryan helped me get the medicine out with the needle and I was able to give the injection.  I don't know if Walgreens was suppose to send me the plastic piece for it... The vials were much bigger than the Menopur vials so I couldn't use those for it.    Then I was looking at the bottles and they said "multiple dose vial" on the side of it...  I followed all the directions exactly as I was given and used 1 ml of the water provided and mixed it with the powder and then drew up the entire contents of the vial.  So hopefully I was suppose to get the "multiple dose." This is the first little mini freak out that I have had....  I just want to do it right.  So I started to panic a little and of course got on the computer... which is never a good thing.  I quickly found myself completely overtaken by God's presence.  I closed out of the websites and immediately felt God tell me that He is in control.  I began praying.  I have been praying during this whole process.  I know many of you are praying for us too!  He is in control and I am reminded that it is His miracle!  I pray that his hands run through the medicine and my body so they can do what they are suppose to do.  I pray he provides wisdom and knowledge for the doctors and nurses and that the timing will be right and that their hands will be guided.

My estrogen levels were at 1075 on Sunday.  Yesterday and today I really began to feel a lot more pressure around my ovaries.  Most of the follicles are about 17-18 mm today.  I have 11-12 on each side!  I really do kinda feel like I am about to burst at the seams!  LOL  Take a look at a ruler...  17 mm seems really big!!  I am ready...  I am ready for the next step!

My retrieval appointment is set for 7:30 am on Wednesday.  The transfer is scheduled for Monday.
My mom is coming up tomorrow, Tuesday, to help out!!

Everything is going as planned!

Today, Sunday 1/25, I had another appointment!  Many people ask why they have these appointments on a Sunday or they say they are surprised they have it on a Sunday.  While that is true for regular appointments, my follicles don’t care what day of the week it is and we must stay on schedule.  I have been closely monitored this whole time and I must continue to have sonograms even if it is on a Sunday.  However, you can imagine my surprise when my Doctor walked in to do the sonogram!  All of my other sonograms have been done by my nurse and I certainly didn't expect my doctor to be working on Sunday morning!  But as I stated above we must stay on schedule and I am close enough they needed her to see everything and decide what/when the next step would be!

She gave me a full report after the sonogram and I actually have 11-12 follicles on EACH side (not just total as I previous thought) She said everything was looking really good! Most of my follicles are 14-17 mm.  They are going to have me continue my current medicine for at least 1 more day to give the smaller ones a chance to continue to mature.  This means I will be using my "just in case" medicine!  

My doctor said they are looking at a retrieval date on Wednesday!  It is not set in stone but that is probably when the retrieval will happen!  

After my doctor and nurse have the results from my blood work this morning they will call me with what I will need to do next.  They will tell me when to stop my medication. They will also tell me when to administer the "trigger" shot.  The trigger shot is what will force ovulation. I will administer this shot at home.  It has to go in my buttocks so it will be a little more difficult to administer myself.  Then they will be able to retrieve my eggs.  

A question I also get frequently is, "how are you feeling?"  I am feeling pretty good!  I don't feel too different from taking the shots.  I do have some extra sensitivity around my ovaries but that is not surprising.  They are doing 24 times more work this month!  (that is 2 years worth of eggs!) And I'm sure things are getting crowded in there...  LOL.    The Ganerelix medicine does have a headache as a side effect and I have had several headaches since taking it but I am managing just fine!  My stomach has tiny bruises all over it from the shots but it is not bothersome.  I only have a few shots left!  

Thank you so much for your continued prayer and support!!  We know that God is in control and we trust in Him no matter what happens! 

Getting closer!

I had an appointment on Thursday 1/22. They checked my follicles again through sonogram. They are looking good and growing as they would expect! My estrogen level is up to 450 which is also great!   They said the size of the follicles will continue to grow 2 millimeters per day.

I started taking the Ganerelix shots on Wednesday. They are pre-filled syringes so it is easy to administer it in the morning as I'm rushing around to get out the door for work. This medicine will keep me from ovulating on my own. I will continue to take this shot up until I give the trigger shot.  The trigger shot will force ovulation and that is when the egg retrieval will take place.  The most notice I will have of when the retrival day will be is 2 days.  I am still taking the follitism and Menopur in the evenings. So I give myself 3 shots each day!

I have my next appointment on Sunday morning. They will do another sonogram to check the follicles. Hopefully they will tell me I ready for the retrival!

I also have had to get some refills on my prescriptions. I need to have enough to get me through Sunday! While this was a little frustrating to need to order more medicine, I would have been annoyed had I ordered it in the first place and then not need it.   One of the refills I needed was the Ganerelix. This was "just in case" I need it on Monday.  This "just in case" shot costs $160. :/  The total of the medicine I had to refill was 585. But we know that God is taking care of us and we are able to pay it. There are a couple people who have sent donations to our IVF fund which has been a huge blessing!

Next appointment is Sunday morning!

Follicles are growing!

January 19, 2015

Today I went back to the doctor for another sonogram and blood work!

I have 10-15 follicles on each side!  The follicles are where the eggs are growing.  They said that everything is looking perfect!!  This is great news!  Now we will watch the follicles as the eggs continue to grow and mature.

They also tested my blood and my estrogen level has gone up a lot exactly how it is suppose to!

So what's next???
I start taking Ganirelix on Wednesday.  This is another shot that I will give myself in the morning before work.  This will prevent me from ovulating on my own.  I will continue the other 2 shots in the evening as I have been.

I have my next appointment on Thursday for another sonogram and blood work!

Thank you for your support and prayers!!!

shots

I have taken the first round of shots!  It went well!  The needle is so small you can't even feel it!

2 down 24 to go!

Next appointment is the 19th!

January 14 appointment

Today's appointment went well!! They did another sonogram and said everything looked great! They are ready for me to start my medicine tomorrow! I will be giving myself 2 shots everyday for the next ten days. I will be taking Follitism and Menopur. I have to mix the Menopur myself. They shots are given in my stomach below the belly button.

They also took a blood sample to test my estrogen. At this point they want it to be low.  Oh by the way, Ryan and I passed our infectious disease test.

I have another appointment on the 19th. They will do another sonogram, test my estrogen again, and then determine if I start the next round of medicine. If I am ready then I'll be giving myself 3 shots a day.

Today, I also paid the remaining balance.  It felt good knowing we were able to pay for $7,000 of the total amount (IVF, medicine, and 2 other tests) with money we were able to save and from what I have made from Jamberry!!  We are wanting to pay the $6,000 loan off quickly because the interest rate is high! Praying for continued success with Jamberry!!

Thank you everyone for praying for our journey.  We are praying that God wraps his arms around my body! We know that I can take all the medicine I want but that only God can give the miracle of life! Pray for knowledge and wisdom for the doctors and nurses! We are also praying for the debt to be paid off quickly!  Thank you for praying with us!

Medicine arrived

I got my medicine on Saturday, 1/10.  I was surprised at how large the box was!

I opened it up and begin going through it all to make sure it was all there.  I am not going to lie... I was a little overwhelmed!
I quickly typed up an email to my nurse with all my questions!  Some of the medicine say I have 99 refills...  LOL... really hoping it doesn't come to that!

Here is a picture of it all!  You can't see all the needles and syringes in the picture!  I start giving myself 2 shots a day on the 15th.  And for a few days I'll be giving myself 3 shots a day.  Ryan says he wants nothing to do with helping me administer the shots.  LOL.  Some of the medicine I have to mix myself.  I have to be able to put together the syringes and needles.  Some of the syringes come with a huge needle that I have to switch out for a smaller one!  We are keeping all of this on the a top shelf where Austin cannot get to it.  I am glad they sent the red safety trashcan to keep all the used materials in.

Trail Transfer

Yesterday (1/5) I had an appointment to have a trial transfer.  This was a real quick check to make sure the doctor could get in where she needed to be with the tools that she needed to use.  She said everything was great and it would be no problem!  Great news!

They also did a saline solution clean out of everything...  so they pumped me full of water and had a sonogram and took pictures of everything.  They said everything looked great!  Of course, after pumping me full of water, the water then decides when it wants to drain..... so that was lovely.  haha.
After all of that, I talked to my nurse about all the medicine I will be getting.  She showed me what it will look for and how to administer it.  She said that there will be some days that I have to give myself 3 shots.  One of the shots I have to mix myself so she showed me how to do that.  I am a little overwhelmed by all the medicine but I think once I get it and know exactly which days to do what, it will be ok!!  Ryan said he wants nothing to do with helping me administer the shots.  lol

I also had labs drawn.

After talking to the pharmacy again to finalize everything, it was discovered that the first person I talked to forgot to calculate in one of the medicines so the total price was more than the original quote.  Though at 2,350 it is still quite a bit lower than the very first quote we were given of between 3000-5000.

We also got approved for a loan.  We didn't get approved for as much as we had hoped for but we should still be ok!  Ryan is putting in more to our HSA which is matched by his employer!  We are happy that RCI is helping us pay for it!  :)

This puts our total available funds just a couple hundred over the total amount.  Which is good and we are hoping there aren't any additional costs that may come up!  We are mapping out our budget and plan on having the 6,000 loan paid off before baby comes!  

I also talked to my principal at work.  I needed to talk to him because there will be a period of 10 days where I have to go in for a sonogram about every other day and the earliest the appointments can be is 7:30.  I needed to talk to him about it to tell him why I may be late and to ask if it was ok to be late or if I needed to take a half day.  I was so nervous as I was preparing to talk to him about it.  He is new this year and I am still getting to know him.  However, I already knew he was and understanding guy!

So I peeked in his office and asked if he had a minute.  He was eating lunch and said yes.  I went in and closed his door.  His expression changed, he stopped eating, and he seemed to be a little confused because when the door closes, you know it is serious!

I sat down and said, "I am just going to be completely honest with you."
At this point, he is looking at me like, "oh gosh... what is she about to tell me."  There was a look of worry and curiosity.
I said, I just wanted to be honest and I told him that my husband and I had been trying to get pregnant for about 21 months and had been unsuccessful.  I then explained that we had been told that IVF was our only option at this point.  I didn't go into too much detail about that, but then explained that there would be some days that I would need to miss work and/or be late to work.  I had my handy dandy Erin Condren planner (thanks to Natalie!) and showed him the official start date (1/14) and explained that after the appointment on the 19th, I would have to go in for a sonogram about every other day, but the exact days and details were still up in the air.

I explained that I requested all my appointments be at 7:30, the earliest time, and that I would probably be able to be to work by 8:30 or shortly there after.  We have to be to work by 8 so I asked him if it was ok if I was late or if he wanted me to take a half day.  We decided together that if I can have everything covered that it would be ok if I was late.  I do have a student teacher, and I don't want to take advantage of her, I am very confident that she will be able to handle the morning routine on her own.  There are also some Para's and specialists who would be willing to help out!  After all, I do work with one of the most amazing staff ever!!  So caring and helpful!

So I was very relieved that the conversation with my principal went well.  He was very understanding and supportive!  I am glad I don't have to worry about being late or stress out about taking so many half days.....  In case you didn't know, as a teacher it is a lot of work to be gone!

My next appointment is on the 14th and I will have a sonogram and blood work again.  They want the estrogen to be low at that point so that is one thing they will be looking at.  I will begin the administering the medicine on the 15th.

So how much does this all cost??

Our first visit with the Doctor about IVF was a very informative consultation about what IVF meant and what the process was.  I can go into deal about that later....

We were told that IVF would cost $9,850.  We also learned that KU Reproductive Center was the cheapest compared to all surrounding areas even though it was the best place to do it at!  On this day they told us that my medicine alone would cost an additional $3,000-$5,000.  They also explained that Ryan and I would both need to have an infectious disease test that would be $1000 each.  Then I would have some pre-testing done that would be an additional cost as well.... probably several hundred more dollars.

As you can see this is a huge cost.  Nothing is covered by insurance.  It all has to be paid up front before the first IVF appointment.  Obviously this is something we were worried about but instead of worrying about it we have been praying about it.

Back story:
We had been praying for our finances and for God to help us with getting a budget that works and also for help to save our money.  I was invited to a friend's online Jamberry party.  On the very last day, my sister Rogie posted a picture a sample she tried.  I thought, "What!  Rogie is doing this... ok, I need to check it out!" So I bought a few sheets and eagerly waited for them to arrive.  In the mean time, I began researching about this company.  I learned it was a new company.  I believe I felt God telling me this was an opportunity.  I talked to my friend, Natalie, who had introduced me to the product and learned more about it and how it can all be done online and at my own pace and convenience.  Before any of my sheets arrived and tried it myself, I signed up to be a consultant.  I knew this was the path God wanted me to take!!  I had no idea what it would actually mean.....

I made my investment back in less than a week and in a month I was making enough to pay for day care for Austin.  At first we were really enjoying the new income... going out to eat more often and making more spur of the moment purchases that weren't really necessary.  Again, I felt God telling me, "this is not what this is for."  We decided to stop spending and save.

I found myself recruiting to build my team and selling Jamberry products successfully each month.  My team was growing and I was advancing through the ranks quickly.  By November 2014 I had achieved Team Manager Status.  This meant I had a successful downline and was going to be making more money from their sales.  What a blessing!!!  Now we had some savings and I knew exactly what it was for!!

Today:
As of January 1, we have about 3500 in Jamberry money saved up.  We also have about 2000 saved up in our Health Savings account which is through Ryan's work.  RCI matches how much Ryan puts into the account, up to a certain amount.  And yes, this can be used by Ryan, Austin, or I for medical expenses!

We also are getting rid of our Dish Network to save about $80 a month as well as using a Child Care Dependent Reimbursement plan.  This means that our child care expenses are deducted from my paycheck before taxes come out.  It saves us about 100 a month because the taxes will be lower.  We were a little worried about this because it means we get deducted the child care expenses from my check but we pay for child care from our account AND THEN get reimbursed.  So it is like paying for child care twice and then waiting for the reimbursement.  Last month, Ryan was given a raise at RCI.  His raise per month is EXACTLY the same amount that was going to be deducted from my check.  This means our take home pay stays the same!!!  WHAT A MIGHTY GOD WE SERVE!  We can wait for the reimbursement without having to worry!  Ryan also got a 1,200 bonus the end of the year which promptly went into savings.  So all together we have about 6700 saved for our IVF cost.

More Blessings!
CHECK THIS OUT!  We were told from the very beginning that Ryan and I's infectious disease test would be 1000 EACH.  I just found out that it will actually only cost us 350 EACH if we don't turn it in to insurance.  It would cost 1200 each if turned into insurance and then denied.  We already know insurance doesn't cover this cost so instead of it costing us 2000 it will only cost 700!!!  GOD IS GREAT!!!

Medications:
This morning I was on the phone with the pharmacy about my medicine I need.  He told me that it would cost 2900 for all of my medicine!  I was so excited because this is lower than they originally told me.  I had also been told that I would qualify for a 100 savings for every 1000 spent.  I let him know that and he informed me that since I was running everything through insurance I wouldn't qualify for that savings.

I asked him how much my insurance was paying.  He looked again and discovered that the Co-Pay with insurance would be higher than how much it would be if just paid for with cash.  Did I tell how how mighty my God is????  My total cost for my medicine without insurance at all is 2169.   That is 731 LESS!!  I also qualify for the 100 discount on every 1000 spent making my grand total for my medicine 1959!  What a blessing!!!  God has taken care of us!!

I know there will probably be some other costs come up that we don't know about...  but we have already been blessed with lower costs in nearly every category!!!  When I joined Jamberry I had no idea what God's bigger picture would be!  I have a lot of comfort in knowing how much jamberry money comes in each month!  We still have to apply for a loan so that we can pay for the entire cost up front but having the savings and extra income from Jamberry has certainly helped lift some weight off our shoulders!

God answers prayer!

1 year later- and results

In April of 2013 Ryan and I found ourselves in a much better financial place!  Ryan had gotten a job at Research Concepts!  This was a much better job for him in many ways!  It was going to give him experience in his field, paid better, and provided flexible hours!  This is exactly what we needed!  Even when Ryan needed to go to school he could make up the hours he missed at his convenience!  What a blessing!!!  By this time I had also completed my masters degree and therefore received a pay raise from my job!   Things were looking pretty good!!!

We decided it was time to have another baby and we were praying about it!  After the first several months went by we began praying more about it and also listening to God!  I felt God saying, "wait. something bigger is coming."  I didn't know what this meant.  I didn't know what "bigger" was....  I only knew he was telling me "bigger" not "better." We had been trying for about 18 months. After many visits to my doctor to have various tests done we were referred to a specialist that was partnered with KU med.  We continued to pray and waited for God's answers.  Ryan and I both had tests done at this point.  We waited a long 3 weeks to get all of the results back.

The results:
All of my tests came back great.  Everything was working properly and there was nothing to indicate otherwise.
Ryan's tests came back and we realized he had low count and low motility.  This definitely got our attention.  His numbers were severely low.  12,000 count (normal is 30 to 40 million) and motility was below 30%.  This gave us a 1% chance go get pregnant on our own.  I told Ryan the news as he was driving to the lake to meet up with me.  Understandably, he was angry and confused.  Why was this happening???  He felt the Holy Spirit come over him at that point and said, "I need you to see something."
We didn't know what was coming or what the answer would be.

Ryan started seeing a male infertility doctor.  This Dr. is the #1 doctor in the country!  After some more tests a lump was discovered on Ryan's scrotum.  After the Dr. revealed that to us and said that more tests would need to be done.  I was terrified....   was the "bigger" about to be revealed???  More testing was done and more waiting was done.  The Dr. determined that the lump was not cancerous at this time and gave us no reason to worry about it.  However, we now know that it is there.  We know to watch it.  We would have never known this had we gotten pregnant right away.

Ryan's Dr. decided to put him on Clomid.  This medicine would help boost his numbers.  After being on the medicine for 3 months his numbers went up 10 times!!  This was great news but still put us in the range of needing IVF.  While we don't know what caused this or why this path was chosen for us we trust and follow Jesus to carry us on our journey!

After trying on our own for about 21 months...  IVF begins on Monday January 5th 2015.  

3 years ago

Sometime at the beginning of the year in 2012 we decided to begin growing our family more.  Austin was about 16 months old at the time.  We made the decision and I went off birth control for 1 month.  We prayed about our decision and God told us to wait.  We realized that we were not in a financial situation that would support another baby.  This was also one of Ryan's busiest semesters at school.  He was still working at Dillards which did not allow flexible hours.  All of these things put together told us to wait.  So back on birth control I went....